back to school

I have successfully survived my first day of my 3rd year of college! I am so pumped for this semester. I feel like I will be challenged, stretched, and exhausted. It is very exciting! I'm taking mostly Gen. Ed. classes including American Government, MT History, American Literature, Human Geography, and Methods for K-8 Art. I am very excited to be taking these classes now that I am actually serious about college. I really want to be organized, involved, and excited about my classes. That's kinda the whole point! I want to become an elementary ed teacher, so I need to devote all my energies to gleaning the most out of every class, every teacher, every assignment, and every textbook.

In other news... I have been so full of joy lately! It is so awesome to be filled completely by the Holy Spirit with joy and peace. It's unbelievable how obsessed I can be with one thing, but all of a sudden have a complete change of heart about it, and hardly think about that one thing that I was overcome by for so many weeks. I can't even explain it. Thank you, God, for lifting a burden off of me!

Please continue your prayers for perseverance, encouragement, and diligence! Also, PLEASE let me know if there is anything that I can pray for for you!

Psalm 16

Keep me safe, O God, I've run for dear life to you.
I say to God, "Be my Lord!"
Without you, nothing makes sense.

And these God-chosen lives all around—
what splendid friends they make!

Don't just go shopping for a god.
gods are not for sale.
I swear I'll never treat god-names
like brand-names.

My choice is you, God, first and only.
And now I find I'm your choice!
You set me up with a house and yard.
And then you made me your heir!

The wise counsel God gives when I'm awake
is confirmed by my sleeping heart.
Day and night I'll stick with God;
I've got a good thing going and I'm not letting go.

I'm happy from the inside out,
and from the outside in, I'm firmly formed.
You canceled my ticket to hell—
that's not my destination!

Now you've got my feet on the life path,
all radiant from the shining of your face.
Ever since you took my hand,
I'm on the right way.

don't worry God, i'm strong enough.

Now that summer is well underway, I've decided to post another blog. ;) This summer has started so great. I'm working multiple jobs, and staying very busy. I'm loving spending time with my family, but also realizing how excited I am to be on my own and discovering life beyond my imagination. I had the opportunity to go camping last weekend with my family and some family friends. It was so fun to just get away from the busyness for a while and play card games, kayak, boat, eat s'mores, and just share incredibly valuable time with the people that I love, and the people that love me unconditionally.

I've been realizing the absolute, unconditional love God has for me. It's amazing to see how even when I'm falling away from Him, or when I'm not giving Him as much attention as He is absolutely worth of, He still works in my life. He sends reminders in the smallest ways, and it makes me feel so small and helpless. He reminds me that I am weak. I can't do it alone, and I should've stopped trying to do it alone a really long time ago. I'm not strong enough to do it by myself. I need his Hands of Mercy to cover me. I don't need to be strong enough. I can't be strong enough.

"I know what it is to be in need, and I know what it is to have plenty. I have learned the secret of being content in any and every situation, whether well fed or hungry, whether living in plenty or in want. I can do all this through him who gives me strength." Philippians 4:12-13

"...being confident of this, that he who began a good work in you will carry it on to completion until the day of Christ Jesus." Philippians 1:6

Christianity ≠ Religion

I've been thinking a lot about Christianity and what it really means to be a Christian versus being a Christ-follower. Being a Christ-follower does not mean you are better than any other person. It does not mean you are above other people or that it is your job to judge people or tell people how they are to be living their lives. Being a Christ-follower isn't a religion. Being religious is performing liturgy, attending formal services, listening to sermons, adhering to a hierarchal leadership system, making sure you don't look bad, living according to a set of man-made rules you're not supposed to break, avoiding speaking words you're not supposed to say, steering clear of lines you're not supposed to cross, attempting (hopelessly) to check off all of the tasks on your "To Be Saved" list, and all the while, trying to make sure everyone else is doing the same things. Christians today have forgotten what it means to be a Christ-follower. Christianity has evolved from humility, truth, and love to legalism, righteousness, and religion. I don't want to be called a Christian if that's what being a Christian looks like. I don't want to be called a Christian if that is the witness we give to the world. Christians need to start practicing what we preach. We expect people to listen to us, respect us, and respond to us, but we don't live it. We don't listen to, respect, or respond to the world, so why would the world even think about doing the same to us? In order to make a difference in the world, we have to listen to our God, respect our God, and respond to the Call of our God instead of expecting the world to listen, respect, and respond to our witness. If we do what Christ wants us to do- which is our role in this world- the rest is in His Hands. There is nothing we can do to save ourselves, let alone anyone else.

Following Christ is a relationship. It is not, will never be, and never was a religion. It's more than a name, more than a faith, more than a creed, more than something to believe in, more than giving your allegiance. It has to be more like falling in love, more like losing your heart. It has to be less like a theory and more like a love affair.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mA9IfB7coKg

http://jasongraymusic.wordpress.com/2010/01/30/the-story-behind-more-like-falling-in-love-or-what-vibrant-faith-and-housecleaning-have-in-common/

Day Seventeen

I forgot to mention in my last blog that on Thursday, April 7th, my car broke down. My choir trip also started on Thursday, April 7th. So I had to get my car towed, then ride with the scary tow truck driver back to my school. It was such a crazy day. I was on my way back from the bank when it happened, and as I was broke down on the side of the road, I looked into my passenger seat to see the container from the drive-through at the bank. You know, those tube things that banks use to transport things through those long mysterious tubes? Yup. Unfortunately, I had accidentally stolen it, but I couldn't do anything about it because I was stuck on the side of the road! It was quite the ordeal, but luckily for me I made it back to the school on time to grab my bags and jump on the bus. So now I am car-less for the next 3 1/2 weeks, and will be depending on other people to get to work.

It has also been amazing to see how God has been providing for me. I will be working this summer for the same people I worked for last summer. First, for the Gibbs family, and then cleaning in Glacier Park at a cabin. Also I will be doing other occassional cleaning jobs and babysitting jobs. I'm really excited! I was also offered a full-time job at a Christian preschool/daycare in Whitefish that I could start anytime between June and August. I haven't decided on this one yet because it will probably be a more long term job, and if I continue with my plan to go to Missoula, might not work out. Its very hard for me to be 100% happy with my job situation because Jeremy is struggling so much with finding a job in Kalispell for the summer, let alone in Missoula. Prayers for that would be much appreciated, as well as prayers for following God's will in both of our lives, as well as our future together. :)

Well, this is the final stretch of school. Here's to attempting to find a lost motivation, handing in last minute assignments, excessive amounts of coffee, and odd sleeping hours!

Day Sixteen: Living, Learning, and Moving On

As I'm working my way back into the routine here in rainy Minneapolis, I'm realizing how valuable time is. Time can be short or can seem like an eternity. My trip to the southwest and back seemed so quick, like it barely even happened, but at the same time it seems like Nebraska, Oklahoma, Arizona, California, and Colorado (and everywhere in between) seems like it was an eternity ago. Many of the places we had concerts were followed by home stays for 2-10 members of the choir at each house. I ended up staying with several elderly ladies who had either been divorced or widowed. It was amazing to hear their stories and realize the fragility of life and the importance of the decisions you make. Not necessarily where you go to college or where you live or even your friends. But the big decisions. Who you marry, what you choose to do with where you went to school, where you live, and how you serve the Lord where He has placed you. With God, you can do great things. You can live an amazing life. Without Him, you easily get lost, confused, weak, and lose all the truly wonderful things in life.

So many of the testimonies of my peers were so amazing. It was unreal to hear some of these young adults' stories and realize how their life could have been unbelievably different if the Lord hadn't saved them. It also made me appreciate and realize what a blessing it has been for me to be raised by the parents God gave me. I was never abused in any way, put into foster care, put up for adoption, or told I wasn't good enough. I was given everything I needed and pretty much everything I ever wanted. I was encouraged, loved, cared for, and strengthened by my parents. I have taken this blessing for granted.

It was so amazing to see so many works of God's Hand. The Grand Canyon, the California coast, mountains in Utah, cactuses (cacti?), palm trees... just to name a few! Touring was fun, but it was a lot of long hours in the bus and in the choir robes. But after lots of fast food, countless pot lucks, not enough coffee, never enough sleep, lots of sore muscles, and being taught by so many people in so many ways, all I can really do is cherish those moments, don't give up, trust in God, and just keep Simply Living.

Day Fifteen

Well, it's Wednesday! Tomorrow I'm leaving Minneapolis for 18 days for choir tour. We're going to be all over the United States, including South Dakota, North Dakota, Kansas, Nebraska,Arizona, California, and Colorado. It's going to be a blast! I'm excited to see what the Lord is going to do in the lives of those our choir reaches out to as well as the members of the choir.

Our new phones just got activated today, and it's been fun getting used to my new touch screen.

I'm excited for this summer and next year, but I'm really enjoying where I am now, also. It will be fun to go the the UM Griz football/basketball games next year too. :)

I'll try to keep everyone posted while on choir tour, but the chances of seeing a blog post during that time are pretty slim. :)

"Do not let any unwholesome talk come out of your mouths, but only what is helpful for building others up according to their needs, that it may benefit those who listen. And do not grieve the Holy Spirit of God, with whom you were sealed for the day of redemption. Get rid of all bitterness, rage and anger, brawling and slander, along with every form of malice. Be kind and compassionate to one another, forgiving each other, just as in Christ God forgave you."
Ephesians 4:29-32

Inadequate

Who are we to expect someone to die for us to pay the ransom for our souls? On this earth, someone would probably not die for someone who is "righteous." Someone may lay their life down for someone else if they were a good person tho. Our Lord and Savior died for us, unholy, wretched, sinners. He laid his life down for ours, and we are bad people! We are inadequate candidates of his love and affection. We are undeserving! We do nothing, and He loves us. He picks us up, carries us, comforts us, and always allows us to come back to Him. I remember my parents telling me when I was younger that there was nothing I could do that would make them love me less, and that was true. The same goes for our heavenly Father. He loves us, and there's nothing we can do to make Him love us less. Isn't that amazing?

Romans 5:6-8
"You see, at just the right time, when we were still powerless, Christ died for the ungodly. Very rarely will anyone die for a righteous person, though for a good person someone might possibly dare to die. But God demonstrates his own love for us in this: While we were still sinners, Christ died for us."